Being afraid can feel like getting stuck in your own horror show—your heart pounds, your pupils dilate, and you may gasp or scream. These reactions are not under conscious control; they’re rooted in biology. Like all emotions, fear plays an important role. It helps you survive and bolt for safety.
As psychotherapists who specialize in Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy (AEDP), we know that being able to name and work with fear is good for health. Acknowledging your emotions makes you less likely to suppress or avoid them, drink too much, or become numb to what you’re feeling.
If you’d like to safely explore your relationship with fear this Halloween season, here are five exercises we recommend.
A healthier approach is to get out of your head and tune into your body. During a frightening moment, notice the telltale signs of alarm, like trembling hands, a racing heart, or feeling cold. These physical sensations are important messengers that clue you into what core emotions you’re experiencing.
Watch fear come and go
Gripping, painful emotions can seem permanent. But watching them come and go can remind your brain that even the most frightening experiences are temporary.
Curiosity helps us embrace a sense of wonder. Research shows that a curious mindset can cultivate positive emotions and reduce worry.
You can also practice what eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) therapists call “dual attention.” Keep your eyes glued to the frightening scene and stay with the sensations in your body as you take deep belly breaths. Research shows that belly breathing increases parasympathetic regulation of the heart through vagal pathways, helping the body settle into a calmer state.
Discover how fear makes you want to move
In AEDP, we call these “adaptive actions,” and they offer clues about how your nervous system responds to perceived danger.
Noticing fear’s impulses expands your emotional awareness and sets the stage for you to work through other core emotions with greater wisdom.
Notice how connection changes fear
We recommend this experiment: Watch a horror movie alone, and then with someone you trust. Or visit a haunted house with a trusted friend or partner. Notice what happens when you share the experience.
And when we know emotions aren’t something to fear, we’re better equipped to handle life’s challenges with authenticity, flexibility, and courage.
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