Not that any of those names stopped me from endlessly prying into other people’s business and then talking about it. I grew up to be a historian and newspaper columnist, which is just a fancy type of gossiping. But from the day that the dinner lady told me off to now, I have struggled to understand why gossip is regarded so poorly. Even as a small child, I saw that everyone did it, and it seemed like women did it more than men, or at least that was the message I received in films, TV, and endless jokes about women “wittering”. What I couldn’t understand was why I wasn’t allowed to join in?
Interestingly, there are studies showing key differences between how men and women gossip. In 2019, researchers from the University of California conducted an in-depth study to determine who gossips and why. They found that women engage in “neutral gossip” more than men do, but that men indulge in “negative” and “positive” gossip just as much as women do.
square KATE LISTER I tried to go a week without telling a lie – and learned how dishonest I am
Read More
What’s more, gossip actually serves an essential evolutionary function. Sharing information bonds large groups of people and fosters cooperation. It allows us to identify who is trustworthy and who should be avoided. How else could such information be gleaned, unless you ask for it? Historically, this has been particularly important for women who have been denied political, economic, and financial power. Swapping information can literally save lives.
When you boil it right down, gossiping is an enjoyable pastime that bolsters friendships. I love nothing more than having a proper natter with a mate when there are some juicy nuggets thrown in, and I know you probably do too. Which brings me back to my original question: why do we view those who enjoy a gossip so harshly? Surely, we are all being stonking great hypocrites.
Have you ever got mad with someone because they told someone else the thing that you told them that you weren’t supposed to tell them? You see? Rules. Gossip is ubiquitous but selective. We share information with specific groups of people (or persons) and expect that confidence to stay contained within that clique. What we don’t want is someone who just blabs across multiple social groups. People who can’t keep anything to themselves are social menaces and should be avoided.
Gossiping does all kinds of positive things, but it becomes damaging when the primary intent is to cause harm. We all know someone who never has a good thing to say about anyone and always seems to be stirring the pot. These people are the good gossip’s Achilles’ heel.
The golden rule of gossip is that the content must be true, and it must be done to trade useful information and/or to bond. The silver rule is that the people you tell must keep said gossip within that group. (The bronze rule is to never write it down, ever.)
It all boils down to why you are sharing this juicy little titbit in the first place. When we gossip, we are doing much more than trading information. The act itself is important because when we divulge a bit of gossip, we are saying “I trust you,” “I want your advice,” “I like you”. This sacred act becomes corrupted when the intention is to cause damage either to the subject of the gossip or the recipient of it. This is gossip at its most dangerous and manipulative.
So, as Alice Roosevelt Longworth said, if you don’t have anything nice to say, then please come and sit next to me.
Hence then, the article about i m a proud gossip and all my male friends are too was published today ( ) and is available on inews ( Middle East ) The editorial team at PressBee has edited and verified it, and it may have been modified, fully republished, or quoted. You can read and follow the updates of this news or article from its original source.
Read More Details
Finally We wish PressBee provided you with enough information of ( I’m a proud gossip – and all my male friends are too )
Also on site :