The year 2025 marked the 50-year anniversary of the passing of the Sex Discrimination Act 1975 in the UK. Fifty years! We have only had sex equality inscribed into UK law for 50 flipping years. That was the same year Jaws was released in the cinema and Queen sent “Bohemian Rhapsody” into the world. It’s no time at all.
The Act, and others like it passed around the world, made it illegal to discriminate against people based on their sex or marital status. This covered things like employment, training, education, goods, services, and housing. Until 1975, women often couldn’t get a credit card or a loan without a husband or father cosigning for it. Married women in Ireland had no share in their family home until 1976. Women in the UK and Ireland could be fired for getting pregnant and were frequently paid considerably less than their male coworkers.
The law may have changed, but social attitudes were considerably slower to shift. It took a very long time for the full impact of the 1975 Act to kick in, but now we are living in a time where women in the UK are not financially or legally dependent on men. We do not need them as our foremothers did only a few generations ago. Today, women are dating based on personality alone, and the birth rates are plummeting.
The term for straight women becoming disaffected with romantic relationships is called “heterofatalism”. The term was coined in 2019 by Asa Seresin, who defined it as women’s “regret, embarrassment, or hopelessness about straight experience”. And 2025 was the year of the heterofatalist.
The single women movement has been rumbling away for a few years now, but 2025 saw it burst forth into the daylight as more and more women decide they are done with dating. They have zero interest in living with a man who will mess up their scatter cushions, eat all their food, and try to shag their friends. It’s just not cool to date a man anymore.
We saw rise of the social media influencers such as Charlie Taylor and Mel Hamlett, whose entire USP is how to “decentre men” from your life, and they rack up hundreds of thousands of views. We have seen the Korean 4B Movement trending online, and young women starting to view it as a perfectly sensible reaction to what is on offer in most heterosexual relationships. In 4B, women refuse to date, marry, live with, or have sex with men.
Even a few years ago, being a single lady came with a hefty dollop of stigma and shame, but no longer – quite the opposite in fact. There is so much work being done to call out the emotional and domestic labour of women in heterosexual relationships that being paired up almost feels like a betrayal of the sisterhood.
This didn’t happen overnight. It’s been a very slow burn, but surely political events around the world have played a significant part in this social shift. We have witnessed reproductive rights continue to be rolled back across America. Why on earth should women have anything to do with men when they don’t have safe access to reproductive healthcare?
Then there is the continuing popularity of misogynist clowns like Andrew Tate, whose deep loathing of women is appealing to disaffected young men. The rise of violent misogyny is surely a major factor in women, en masse, deciding they are done with men entirely.
As comedian Leslie Jones said in a now viral clip at the end of 2024: “I am single because I am tired of raising boys… I am not your mother. Grow up.” And the same energy has taken us into 2025. The message being repeated again and again is simple: men are going to waste your time, your energy, your resources, and even your health, if you let them.
Writer Chanté Joseph captured the mood of 2025 perfectly in her viral Vogue article, “Is Having a Boyfriend Embarrassing Now?” This article came just a few months after the New York Times ran the article “The Trouble With Wanting Men”. Being paired up is no longer something to show off but rather something to be explained – just ask Taylor Swift.
When Swift released her 2025 album The Life of a Showgirl, much was made of the fact she dedicated most of it to her fiancé, Travis Kelce. Swift was once the patron saint of single women, and to listen to her suddenly singing about being saved by a man, and how great his penis is, felt a little jarring to say the least. Fan reactions veered from cheering her on to claiming she was actually a right-wing trad wife who had been conning us all along.
I wouldn’t go that far, but I confess, as a single woman, I did feel a little let down by Mother Swift singing about being saved from “the fate of Ophelia” by Travis Kelce and his wonder dong. For the record, Ophelia didn’t die because she was single and lonely – she was driven mad by men and drowned herself. But go off, I guess.
This year also saw the release of Lily Allen’s latest album, West End Girl, which documents in unflinching detail the breakdown of her marriage to David Harbour. It was the antithesis to Swift’s loved-up The Life of a Showgirl, and women related hard to what she was saying. The lies, the cheating, the sheer exhaustion of trying to manage a grown man’s emotions all resonated deeply.
Much of the conversation online was women sharing their own experiences and how Allen’s album had given voice to their own frustration with men. One article ran with the headline “Lily Allen’s West End Girl reflects the idea that women are becoming increasingly disaffected with men”.
This dissatisfaction is showing up as increasing numbers of women choose to be single. This year has seen women continue to turn away from dating apps in droves. Ofcom’s annual Online Nation report for 2025 found that female visitors to these apps fell by 1.7m compared with last year. Overall use has been in decline for several years, but now men outnumber women on Tinder by three to one.
Single women are on the rise and if one piece of research is to be believed, 45 per cent of women aged between 25 and 44 will be single by 2030, the largest share in history, much to the chagrin of right-wing “traditional values” commentators who love to tell women how fulfilling their lives would be if only they submitted entirely to a husband and gave up on their own dreams to raise his babies and fold his laundry. But we aren’t listening.
The Office for National Statistics has reported that more women than ever are now living alone – 40.9 per cent of women aged 65 or over live by themselves, compared with just 27 per cent of men of the same age. This could be because women live longer than men, but it could also be because 61 per cent of men remarry or start a new relationship within two years of their wife dying, compared to just 19 per cent of women who are widowed.
Why should this be the case? Because unlike men, women are very happy being single. A research paper from the University of Toronto, published at the end of 2024, found that “single women, on average, report higher levels of satisfaction with relationship status, life satisfaction, sexual satisfaction, and lower desire for a partner”. Women are finally saying the quiet part out loud: life can be a lot easier without men.
Single women are now organising communes to support one another as they age. New Ground in London is the UK’s first cohousing community exclusively for older women and they are popping up all over the world. At The Bird’s Nest women-only commune in Texas, their mantra is “no men and no drama”.
Women are exhausted by heterosexual relationships, and who can blame them? Rates of domestic violence and sexual abuse remain shockingly high, while conviction rates are disgracefully low. Even if you aren’t dating a violent abuser, women are still doing the majority of domestic and emotional labour. They are still the ones providing the bulk of the caring duties, managing their partner’s emotions, handling most of the administrative tasks within the home, and often while working full time as well. Perhaps it was inevitable that as soon as we were able to leave, we did.
The solution to this doesn’t lie with women. We have made our choice. It’s now up to men to work on themselves and reorientate to the new dating dynamic. Women don’t want a project or another child to raise. They want a partner, someone who takes an equal share in the relationship.
I can’t see the rising trend of heterofatalism declining in 2026. If anything, I hope it continues. I hope more women start to protect their peace and claim back just some of the energy they pour into the men they date.
I am sure we will see more right-wing misogynists and conservative commentators continue to blame women for the male loneliness epidemic, falling birth rates, and fight against our reproductive rights. The assault on women’s freedoms will continue, but so too will the fightback.
The old model of dating is dead. Women not only don’t need men anymore, they don’t want them, either.
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