Whether you’re afraid of confrontation or not, it’s never easy to get into it with someone. It doesn’t matter if it’s a heated argument or a slight disagreement; if it’s with someone you know, a conflict can lead to some really harsh things being said. And there are things that, once said, you cannot erase from the other person’s memory, which could spell doom for your friendship, relationship or whatever. And especially in disagreements involving loved ones, you want to really meet them at their level and find empathy to shut down a conflict, rather than just avoiding it or shutting down the conversation without closure.
However, when tensions are high—as they tend to get in an argument—it can be hard to stop talking and think clearly. It can also be tough to even have empathy for the other person, even if you love them. That’s when you want to have some phrases up your sleeve, ready to go, in case you need to employ them on the fly.
That’s when we turn to experts. In a previous article about phrases to use to shut down arguments, positive psychologist and board-certified behavior analyst Reena B. Patel told Parade several viable options. And one of them is an especially empathetic phrase that will end a conflict while keeping relationships intact.
Related: Psychologist Says the 1 Phrase That Instantly Shuts Down a Confrontational Person Isn’t What You Might Think
Why It’s Important To Address Conflicts Correctly
Patel shared why disagreements can get so heated and both sides just start saying things they might not mean, or mean to say out loud. And why it’s so important to address conflicts with grace and tact.
“Effective and intentional communication is key,” she previously said. “When you have conflict, and you are ‘word vomiting,’ oftentimes your point is not coming across clearly. Everyone gets on the [defensive] or is even more confused [and] conflicted, [which] creates more conflict.”
There are a lot of times when, as a mature adult, you should just walk away from a disagreement or tussle. Maybe you’re driving and someone made you miss your light, or maybe it’s at a concert and a stranger is being belligerent with you. Or maybe it’s such a trivial issue that you know you’re better off moving along, picking your battles wisely. But especially if your safety is potentially at risk, avoiding a conflict entirely is the best option.
Related: Psychologist Says if You Go Quiet When You’re Upset, You Likely Have These 7 Traits
But in instances that involve people you know, especially family, friends and significant others, you don’t want to get used to being avoidant regarding hard issues. Patel told Parade that if a conversation needs to be had in scenarios like this one, then it’s better to get it over with.
“If it’s an important issue to you and is affecting you personally, both your mental health and well-being, then it’s time to talk,” she stated. “Holding it in and letting it go can create the least amount of conflict in the moment, but resentment will build, and it could create a bigger issue and bigger blowup later on.”
The Empathetic Phrase To Use in a Conflict, According to a Psychologist
While there are several things you can say that can end a conflict then and there, one really stood out as highly empathetic: “I understand where you are coming from, but I think differently.”
At first glance, maybe this seems like an “agree to disagree” statement, but it does a bit more than that age-old (and somewhat frustrating) adage.
“You are showing empathy here by saying you understand, but the key part of this statement is that you are not agreeing with them,” Patel said. “You are acknowledging their thoughts and feelings but holding your own line.”
Related: Psychologist Says the 1 Phrase That Instantly Shuts Down a Nosy Person Isn’t What You Might Think
Instead of dismissing them by saying, “Let’s just decide we can’t see eye-to-eye and move along,” this phrase is gentler and finds common ground with the other person. Validating someone’s fears or beliefs, when you’re able to, is always a good place to start, even if you think differently than they do.
This statement not only validates them, but also shares that you’re not in agreement with them, so that you don’t just bend to their side of things. But it should shut down conflict by letting them know you’re no longer down for a conversation that is turning into a fight. And that you want to respect everyone involved, including yourself and your relationship with this person. It’s rather mature and hopefully is received with courtesy. If not, it’s a good thing to end on as you walk away, squashing the animosity completely.
Up Next:
Related: We Asked 4 Psychologists the One Phrase That Escalates Every Argument—They All Said the Same Thing
Source:
Reena B. Patel is a licensed educational psychologist, parenting expert and board-certified behavior analyst.Hence then, the article about psychologist recommends this empathetic phrase in a conflict was published today ( ) and is available on Parade ( Saudi Arabia ) The editorial team at PressBee has edited and verified it, and it may have been modified, fully republished, or quoted. You can read and follow the updates of this news or article from its original source.
Read More Details
Finally We wish PressBee provided you with enough information of ( Psychologist Recommends This Empathetic Phrase in a Conflict )
Also on site :
- Get Your First Look at a New Dark Academia Fantasy ‘Our Dark Incantations’ by Wanda Hellmund [Exclusive]
- 1981 Rolling Stones Song, Left Unfinished for Nearly a Decade, Remains a Classic Rock Favorite 45 Years Later
- As U.S. Treasury intervened in the bond market, the Netherlands rushed 86 tons of gold out of America because of ‘geopolitical unrest’