When life feels hard, many of us may begin to dissociate and become more apathetic—especially when the challenges come from something we've put on a pedestal, like our careers, reputations or outputs. Whether it's a layoff, gossip that isn't true or a personal obstacle that gets in the way of our own productivity, it's easy to feel lost or unmoored. After all, our identities often get so wrapped up in these sometimes-uncontrollable aspects of our lives.
When something major shakes those identities, we might feel as if life has lost its meaning, or question our purpose. But for one psychologist, the Japanese concept of "ikigai" has helped her navigate these difficulties and look at self-worth and belonging in a whole different light.
Here, Dr. Deepika Chopra (aka "The Optimism Doctor"), professional psychologist and author of The Power of Real Optimism: A Practical, Science-Based Guide to Staying Resilient, Curious, and Open Even When Life Is Hard (released on March 10), shares ikigai's meaning with Parade and why its made such an impact not only on her own inner life but on her studies and work as well.
She reveals how to practice ikigai yourself, common mistakes to avoid and why its focus on finding true meaning and connection sets you up for an optimism that lasts—even if your circumstances fluctuate.
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Ikigai's Meaning
In Dr. Chopra's book, The Power of Real Optimism, she writes that her favorite method to identify your life's purpose is "the Japanese practice of finding one's ikigai," explaining that "it is a combination of the words iki (meaning "life") and kai (meaning, essentially, "fruitfulness" or "the result of effort") and roughly translates into "reason for living."
"I first heard about ikigai during a trip to Japan in my early twenties, at a time when I was asking big questions about purpose and direction," Dr. Chopra tells Parade. "I met [other] travelers on a small bus which was leading up to a mountain temple complex who talked about Okinawan culture, particularly moai—small, lifelong support groups built around connection, belonging and shared care. That idea immediately caught my attention."
This idea felt completely new and ground-breaking.
"What struck me most was how different this approach felt from the pressure we often place on ourselves to 'figure it all out' alone," she shares. "Learning about moai led me to explore Okinawan culture more deeply, and that’s when I came across ikigai."
She has written that in Japanese culture, "Ikigai can describe multiple things, including activities that bring life meaning, the motivation to fulfill that meaning, and the general sense that one's life has meaning."
Related: How To Break Out of a Pessimistic Mindset, According to a Psychiatrist
"What resonated wasn’t the idea of a single life purpose, but the understanding that meaning is lived daily and evolves over time," she continues telling Parade. "That perspective has stayed with me ever since and deeply informs my work today. In The Power of Real Optimism, I write about optimism not as blind positivity, but as staying engaged with life—finding meaning, connection and agency even when the future feels uncertain. Ikigai offers a grounded, human way to do exactly that."
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Simon Element
In order to stay engaged with life in this intentional way, Dr. Chopra recommends asking yourself these exact questions that she herself "returns to often."
What activities give me energy rather than drain it?When do I feel most like myself?What do people naturally come to me for?What feels meaningful even when it’s hard?What values do I want my time to reflect right now?What am I willing to practice, not just wish for?Where am I growing—even if it’s uncomfortable?What feels worth sustaining over time?"These questions aren’t meant to be answered all at once—they’re meant to be revisited as life changes," she says.
These prompts are especially helpful because they can assist you in identifying four important aspects of your life, as Dr. Chopra shares in her book: What you're good at, what you love, what you can get paid for and what the world needs. Chapter Five in The Power of Real Optimism dives even deeper into ikigai, if you're interested in pursuing it further.
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2 Common Mistakes or Misconceptions People Make When Starting This Practice
Try to avoid these two common pitfalls as you begin ikigai:
"The biggest [mistake] is treating ikigai like a destination instead of a relationship," Dr. Chopra tells Parade. "People often think they need one perfect answer or a single lifelong purpose. In reality, ikigai shifts with age, roles, health and circumstance."
Related: Stop Asking ‘What’s My Passion?’—Ask Yourself This Instead
2. Equating "purpose" only with your job
"Another mistake is tying purpose only to productivity or career," Dr. Chopra says. "Meaning can live in relationships, creativity, caregiving, learning or contribution in small, everyday ways. Optimism grows when meaning is flexible, not rigid."
Related: 16 Things People With a Really Positive Outlook on Life Often Say, According to a Psychologist
While ikigai naturally leads to greater optimism as you begin to find meaning in smaller, everyday ways, Dr. Chopra is also calling out an important self-worth ritual that she relies on for increased positivity.
"I wish everyone practiced regularly acknowledging their own resilience," Dr. Chopra reveals.
Many of us are used to ruminating about past conversations, stressful future decisions and things we wish we had done differently, but we should spend more time giving ourselves credit instead.
"At the end of the day, ask: 'What did I handle today that I once thought would be too much?'" she recommends. "The brain doesn’t naturally store this information—we have to intentionally surface it."
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It makes more of a difference than you might think.
"Self-worth isn’t built through affirmations alone—it’s built through remembering your capacity to respond," Dr. Chopra explains. "That memory is one of the strongest foundations of real optimism."
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Source:
Dr. Deepika Chopra (aka "The Optimism Doctor") is a professional psychologist, visual imagery expert and founder of Things Are Looking Up, a consultancy devoted to the intersection of science and soul. She is the author of The Power of Real Optimism: A Practical, Science-Based Guide to Staying Resilient, Curious, and Open Even When Life Is Hard, holds a doctorate in clinical health psychology and completed a double postdoctoral fellowship at both the University of California at Los Angeles and Cedars Sinai Medical Center. She completed her formal dissertation on the topic of optimism, positive sensory visualization and the connection to optimal well-being.Hence then, the article about the japanese concept a psychologist swears by to find purpose in life was published today ( ) and is available on Parade ( Saudi Arabia ) The editorial team at PressBee has edited and verified it, and it may have been modified, fully republished, or quoted. You can read and follow the updates of this news or article from its original source.
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