For most stand-up comedians, bombing on stage is usually par for the course. But for Marc Maron, a disastrous early-career stand-up gig went so badly that it abruptly ended the show's scheduled run.
While headlining a series of shows in Australia in the early '90s, Maron realized he didn’t have enough material and struggled to connect with audiences, culminating in a painfully silent performance and his eventual dismissal from the gig. He says the experience shook his confidence, led to a relapse in his sobriety, and remains one of the most difficult moments of his career, something he described as "the f---ing worst."
His confidence wavered before the show even began when he arrived in town to find himself heavily hyped on a billboard. Already overwhelmed by being far from home, Maron felt unprepared and insecure. It also didn't help that he had to perform after two warm-up opening acts.
"The first time you deal with that, you're like, 'What the f--- are you doing? You're stopping the whole flow!'" he recalled on the Bombing podcast hosted by Eric Andre. "So I'm just sitting there, watching this show going, 'I'm f---ed. I'm so f---ed.' And I go out there the first night and struggle. It's okay, I stretch at the end, but it's okay. And I go through a whole week of previews where it's just getting worse and worse."
View this post on InstagramThe minute Maron got on stage, it was all downhill, he recounted. "I get out there, I'm the headliner, and I'm smoking — you could smoke then — and some guy yells, 'Where'd you get that jacket,' and it was an American dude," he remembered. "And I was so f---ed up in my head confidence-wise that it just shut me down."
He added, "There was a point where all I could hear in a room full of 400 was the embers of my cigarette burning. It's not just a silence, there's like a suction to it. And I felt myself leave my body. It was literally like, 'I'm gonna go watch from over there.' And then I get off stage, and the owner comes up to me, and he has that look of someone who just saw an accident, he's like, 'Are you okay?' And I'm like, 'Yeah, I guess I'm okay.'"
He wasn't okay.
The following day, he got a call from the club owner, who suggested they end their contract and told Maron, "I think maybe you should just go home." Slightly relieved to not have to continue performing, Maron boarded a plane back home.
"I'd been sober for about a year, and on that plane ride back, totally f---in' got s---faced," he shared. "Totally relapsed. I just drank the whole way home."
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