As the Thanksgiving holiday is a prelude to the holiday season our stress level is on the rise and is defined differently than at other times during the year.
Studies show many people are feeling the stress of the holiday season. In a study by the American Psychological Association nearly 9 out of 10 U.S. adults ( 89%) experience stress during the holidays. This holiday season with COVID-19 and flu still in play those figures will likely increase. A stress free holiday? Probably not, and most of us want to make the best of the holiday with family and friends.
This year with COVID-19, flu season and the government shutdown knocking on our door, travel may be curtailed significantly. According to the U.S. Bureau of Transportation staffing shortages at the FAA and TSA are causing flight delays and cancellations. Airlines have reported this situation has impacted more than 3 million passengers recently.
These changes have changed this holiday season even before it begins. Family traditions such as mom’s homemade turkey and dressing may end up just poignant memories. No preparing the turkey ahead of time or deciding whether you will have pumpkin or pecan pie. Stress free right? I am reminded of the classic movie “It’s a Wonderful Life” where George Bailey is given a second chance to realize just how wonderful his life really was.
Even though people have the choice of where to travel and how to do it, the fear of illness or not getting to your destination for some is strong. Staying at home is a real alternative but at the cost of increasing anxiety and depression. For some who are away from family due to distance, military service or attending school “I’ll Be Home For Christmas” (Bing Crosby) is not happening and “Blue Christmas” (Elvis Presley) is a sad reality.
I am reminded of stories told by relatives and friends long ago about World War II and many holidays with families spread all over the world, uncertain as to what was in store for them in the future. My husband’s uncle Fred was a tail gunner in a B-17 bomber stationed in England and never knew if he would live to see another Christmas. Londoners endured the Blitz and never knew if an enemy bomb was destined to strike them.
We face adversity but not as great as our elderly relatives faced. We need to understand that and believe that the sun will shine again and the skies won’t always be brown with smoke. In the movie Jurassic Park the hopeful phrase “life will find a way” made me smile and it is true for us here and now — we will find a way — a way back to our normal lives and a way to leave most of our stress behind.
How do we cope with this? Here are some thoughts:
• Plan ahead, set your priorities, do the things you enjoy.
• Don’t over commit, say No to some requests.
• Stay connected to others by volunteering.
• Send meaningful gifts and handwritten cards to friends and family.
• Live in the here and now, don’t worry about the future or fuss about the past. Maintain healthy habits like sleep and exercise.
• Set realistic goals and accept that not everything will be perfect.
• Deal with your disappointment, adjust your expectations and focus on what you can control
• Look at each individual stressor and ask yourself, “can I change it, or do I need to let it go?” Feelings come from thoughts and if you can change your thoughts you can change your feelings.
During this holiday season create small moments of joy. Surround yourself with supportive people and make new memories that you talk about next year during the holiday season. Listen to Christmas carols while decorating your tree. For those who have gone through this year light a memorial candle.
Most of all celebrate the season your way and enjoy the moments.
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