Although these celebrities primarily appear to us on screen or on stage, many people feel as though they know them personally because of the meaningful impact they’ve had on their lives. These are known as parasocial relationships or “nonreciprocal social-emotional connections” with public figures and celebrities, per the journal of Current Opinion in Psychology.
In this current cultural moment, we’re seeing collective grief intersect with a psychological phenomenon called parasocial grief. According to psychotherapist and NYU adjunct professor Olivia Verhulst, this can occur when there’s a one-sided sense of familiarity with a public figure after they die. “Relationships don’t need to be reciprocal for feelings to be real,” Verhulst says. “Loss brings up a lot for all of us no matter what form it takes, whether it’s shock, disbelief, or confrontation with our own mortality.”
In comparison with individual grief, shared bereavement is more diffuse. “It doesn’t have the built-in rituals we rely on, like experiences of a funeral and traditional closure,” Moffa explains. Therefore, when celebrities or public figures die, it’s now common practice to post online and engage in comments sections with other grievers. In this way, the comment sections become public memorials.
Verhulst argues that the most significant difference in mutual sorrow is its “being witnessed” and it can offer more validation than individualized grief. “Given that human beings are fundamentally wired for connection, this broader sense of communal loss can feel comforting in many ways,” she says.
Society often pushes individual grievers to move on from their losses, rushing them to heal before they’re ready, which can lead to more people struggling alone. But in our current culture, shared bereavement has become more widely accepted. “Social media has become a kind of ‘modern funeral,’ a space where people can come together online, without the barriers of physical geography getting in the way,” Moffa says. “For a lot of people, it’s become the primary place mourning happens now.”
“When Steinem and Parton passed within days of each other, comment sections turned into genuine gathering places, telling each other how these women shaped their lives. It made the feeling less isolating and more like something they were carrying alongside a whole community instead of alone,” Moffa says.
Integration is another useful method. Moffa suggests creating a small ritual in honor of that person, like playing their music, reading their books, or rewatching a favorite video clip. Then, write down what that person meant to you, rather than what they meant to the world, and talk about it with someone. “This can provide validation and connection, instead of having to carry it alone,” she adds. In fact, a recent study from the Death Studies journal in 2026 found sharing emotions, ceremonies, and rituals offer “sense making, solidarity and healing” in shared mourning.
Verhulst noted there’s an outdated idea that grief occurs in fixed stages which is somehow linear. But, she says, there are truly no universal stages to heal from loss and no right way to grieve.
Sometimes, the best way to mourn is together.
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