Absolute weapon, berk, cretin, sexist dinosaur, creepy, despicable human being, prize idiot. It is tempting to let the insults, from social media platform X, run to the end of the column without further comment. They nail the public sentiment felt towards Richard Keys so eloquently as to render clarification pointless.
However, for the benefit of those who do not spend their days bent over a mobile phone scrolling, here is the post in question.
“Sad to hear the news of Terry Yorath’s passing. He was a warrior and won fans over wherever he played. He was great for us at Coventry and the reason I GOT GABBY A JOB AT SKY (my capitals). I had no idea who she was when we met but I knew her dad. RIP Terry. Your daughter did you proud.”
Keys, a relic of Sky’s early football coverage, when fossils in big jackets would nod and wink their way through the early Paleozoic period, imagined he was saying something nice about the late and universally popular footballer Terry Yorath. In fact he was drooling over himself in the mirror, hijacking the reputation and popularity of the far more accomplished Gabby Yorath (now Logan) to elevate his own.
Odious Cretin is the least of it. Keys got his in a blizzard of invective that triggered a genuinely shocked response. That he doubled down on the inexhaustible self regard will not surprise, either.
“What a shame my words for a footballing hero of mine were ENTIRELY misinterpreted. Terry Yorath was a fabulous guy. A warrior. My affection for him meant I was more than happy to help him and his family in any way I could. Gabby’s career would make any father proud. RIP Terry.”
The commentary around Keys is rich in satire. It reflects not just a refusal to acknowledge wrong but an inability to recognise it. He is an exemplar of the unreconstructed boomer. Correction is utterly beyond him.
The pity he felt was not for his own desperate conceit but for our incapacity to interpret properly the message he wished to convey. Imprisoned by paradox, he blunders through life like every prehistoric male that ever walked with the patriarchy.
Keys in the prime of his career, 32 years ago (Photo: Getty)Logan was onto him long before he hit send on his recidivist post. She wrote in her autobiography how during a flight, Keys and chum Andy Gray allegedly discussed sex and pregnancy in earshot knowing she was herself pregnant whilst sitting in the business class seats behind them.
Keys resigned from Sky 15 years ago following derogatory comments made off air about female linesman Sian Massey-Ellis in another misogynistic exchange with Gray. “Blokes feel a bit aggrieved about this…at least a big important subject matter and second division linesman…can you believe it? Female linesman…the game’s gone mad.”
To which Gray responded by ripping off his loin cloth. Women, he raged, “don’t know the offside rule”. Keys concurred, insisting Massey-Ellis would make a mistake. She called the match without blemish.
The examples of Keys scraping his knuckles along the floor are endless. In another leaked clip off air he famously inquired of Jamie Redknapp “Did you smash it?” in respect of his association with a random female. “Mind you, that’s a stupid question. If you were anywhere near it, you definitely smashed it.”
In response to West Ham vice-chairman Karren Brady complaining about sexism, Keys went full Phil Mitchell, “Do me a favour, love.”
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Keys pontificates these days from Qatar, where he delivers his antique Queen Vic repartee to the audience of beIN Sports. As you might expect from a bloke married to a friend of his daughter, with whom he allegedly enjoyed intimacy during his wife’s treatment for cancer (which he denies), Keys is at home in a country anchored to medieval male behaviours and resolutely tone deaf.
If I had to pick a winner from the slew of takedowns on X it would be this from former Sky colleague Tanya Reynolds, a reductive blow guaranteed to land where it hurts: “Gabby was friendly, professional, well-liked, a pleasure to work with. Richard was…hairy.”
There’s no coming back from that.
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