Both forming and maintaining friendships look different these days, don’t they? Whether you’re coming across a “looking for friends” post on Facebook or chatting with someone you’ve known for a while, conversations about certain hot-button topics inevitably come up. People may take disagreements personally or judge you harshly for what you believe. You might struggle to know what to say, or—on the other end of the spectrum—you might be the first one to ask what someone’s take is. Let’s stop beating around the bush: Political differences are ending friendships. Whether it’s a good thing or a bad thing (or a bit of both), political division is rife these days. It’s on social media and in our conversations. It’s hard (read: nearly impossible) to avoid. A conversation about a new bill or the latest news can turn even the friendliest relationships sour. Knowing how to handle political differences with friends is easier said than done.Regardless of which side you fall on, you might miss the days when friendships felt “easier,” or at least when arguments weren’t relationship-ending. Since politics have long existed, what’s changed? What are the shifts driving this rift? How should we proceed? How can you preserve a relationship (if you want to) with someone who has a fundamentally different belief? A psychologist answers those questions below.Related: Psychologist Warns: This 1 Subtle Sign Reveals a Friendship Is ‘Definitely Unhealthy’
Why Political Differences Are Ending Friendships More Than Ever
Wondering why political disagreement ruins friendships sometimes? We’ll start with what’s perhaps obvious: People are becoming more politically minded, active and passionate. Voter turnout in 2024 was lower than in 2020, but higher than in every other election year since at least 2004.One major contributor to people’s decisions at the polls is what they consume on the internet. According to the Pew Research Center, over half of American adults get their news from social media, which algorithms personalize. These algorithms show us more of what we already watch, which contributes to confirmation bias and an echo chamber (a space where you encounter only similar beliefs). That amplifies our opinions. Add that to the fact that we’re seeing less mental health stigma recently. That’s a good thing, but believe it or not, it can also contribute to the divide.
“People are more politically involved, siloed on social media, but also comfortable with therapeutic tools, like boundaries,” says Dr. Golee Abrishami, PhD, a psychologist and the VP of Clinical Care at Octave Mental Health. “Some people are more in tune with their beliefs and political values, and more comfortable enacting boundaries with loved ones.”And with that, we’re seeing more division—especially as “affective polarization” comes into play.“It’s essentially the widening of the gap between groups of people who hold different beliefs,” Dr. Abrishami says about affective polarization. “It’s about how much people on the other side are disliked or assumed to be bad people based on their beliefs that are different from yours.”Sound familiar?
She adds that affective polarization contributes to the ending of relationships “because people are further apart than ever, and societally that distance is reinforced, sort of like ‘staying loyal to our team.'” She’s seen more people believing those with different views are “dangerous” or “hopelessly wrong,” which naturally decreases connection. Related: Psychologists Recommend This Empathetic Phrase in a Conflict
The Psychological and Cultural Shifts Driving the Rift
Dr. Abrishami named some of the psychological and cultural shifts above, such as higher voter turnout, reliance on social media as a news source, algorithms keeping you siloed, comfort with mental health insights and how the moralization of political views contributes to “us vs. them psychology.” But that’s not all, especially when it comes to the cultural impacts of technological advances. “AI is having a similar effect,” she tells Parade. “An AI chat can quickly turn into an echo chamber. A chatbot can become a companion.” She explains how AI often provides sycophantic responses that solidify people’s viewpoints, biases and beliefs. It’s created to keep the conversation going, and the affirmation it provides can be, for lack of a better word, addicting. Perhaps even scarier, AI chatbots have fooled people into ignoring medical advice.Related: 9 Common Phrases That Could Be Secretly Harming Your Friendships, Etiquette Experts Warn
Is It Okay To End a Friendship Over Political Beliefs?
What does a psychologist think about people ending friendships over political differences?“This is a really complicated consideration and requires you to consider their values and personal boundaries before making a decision,” she states.Rather than focusing on what color hat they wear, she encourages individuals to focus on a few things: how the friend treats you, how they move in your world and how your values are affected. If their views cause harm, you may want to reconsider the friendship.But that’s not your only option, either.
“The better way to approach this is from the framework of personal boundaries,” she shares. For example, you might agree not to talk about politics if it causes tension or just “agree to disagree.” If that doesn’t work, and your friend is disrespectful, it may be time to take another look. “Those are cases where you need to consider if continuing the friendship is contradicting your value system and if you can, in good faith, continue to have that person in your life,” she adds. Related: The #1 Phrase To Say When Someone Asks an Offensive Question
How To Preserve Relationships When You Disagree
Have a friend you want to keep despite their differing opinions? Dr. Abrishami shares tips.
Lead with curiosity: Ask questions, reduce assumptions and try to understand someone’s point of view in the context of their world and circumstances. Focus on values: You may disagree on a topic but agree on the underlying value. Practice self-awareness and find your patterns: Do you escalate conflict or avoid conflict? How does that affect you and your relationships? What might be better ways to handle it? Practice speaking up in small ways: If you tend to “sweep conflict under the rug,” practice speaking up in low-stakes situations, such as a preference for your next meet-up. Have communication tools handy: One tip is to separate the person from the action to lessen how attacked the other person feels and foster more productive conversation. For example, say, “The opinion you shared made me angry,” not “You make me feel angry.” Work with a therapist: Conflict resolution (in whatever form) is both difficult and common. A therapist can help you understand yourself and how to navigate conflict effectively and healthily.“Maintaining personal boundaries risks losing some people in your circle, but can also help with living by your personal ideals and belief systems, and there’s real empowerment in that choice,” Dr. Abrishami adds.
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Sources:
Dr. Golee Abrishami, PhD, is a psychologist and the VP of Clinical Care at Octave Mental Health. Election results, 2024: Analysis of voter turnout in the 2024 general election. (2024) Ballotpedia Social Media and News Fact Sheet. (2025) Pew Research Center.Hence then, the article about remember when we could disagree without ending the friendship psychologist explains what s changed was published today ( ) and is available on Parade ( Saudi Arabia ) The editorial team at PressBee has edited and verified it, and it may have been modified, fully republished, or quoted. You can read and follow the updates of this news or article from its original source.
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