Hayden Panettiere‘s sudden death at the age of 36 has shaken the world. Her father, Skip Panettiere, confirmed the news to ABC News and remembered his daughter as “an incredible light and a force of nature.” No cause of death has been announced.
In her final months, Panettiere spoke with rare openness about one of the most painful decisions of her life and why she chose to let it happen the way it did.
Why Did Hayden Panettiere Give Up Custody of Her Daughter?
In her memoir, This Is Me: A Reckoning, Panettiere explained why she allowed ex-fiancé Wladimir Klitschko to take full custody of their daughter, Kaya, while she battled postpartum depression and addiction. “I knew how bad a place I was in,” she told Fox News Digital.
“When I saw her in the environment over there and the support system that she had, I said to myself, ‘If I fight… it’s going to permanently damage my child.'”
“Not being under the same roof with her every day has been the most gut-wrenching experience of my life, and it’s hard to describe the layers of emotion, including sadness, resentment, and anger, I’ve felt because of it,” an excerpt from her book reads, as per the outlet.
What Happened During Hayden Panettiere’s Delivery With Kaya?
Panettiere traced her struggles back to Kaya’s birth in 2014, when doctors warned of complications and she endured a life-threatening delivery requiring emergency surgery and seven blood transfusions. “I almost passed away while having my daughter,” she recalled, as per Fox News.
How Did Postpartum Depression Turn Into Addiction for Hayden Panettiere?
What she initially dismissed as the “baby blues” grew into severe postpartum depression. She struggled to bond with Kaya, battled anxiety and eventually turned to alcohol.
“When you wake up in the morning and the first thing you’re thinking about is having a drink, it’s a problem,” she said in her book, as per Fox News.
She entered treatment voluntarily, though the depression lingered even after she got sober.
How Did Hayden Panettiere Feel About Her Decision in the End?
Panettiere said she was hurt by headlines suggesting she’d “given up” her daughter. “I felt like I made the right call,” she said. “I’ve seen who she is, and she’s an incredible human being.”
She and Kaya maintained what she called an “incredibly strong” bond through visits and FaceTime, and she hoped sharing her story would help other mothers seek help without shame. “I feel more connected with myself than I ever have before,” she said.
Although Kaya lives in Europe with her father, Panettiere said the distance never weakened their relationship. She traveled to see her daughter whenever possible and stayed closely connected through regular FaceTime calls.
“[She] knows that she’s got two parents that love her, and I know in my heart that she feels supported,” Panettiere said on Jay Shetty’s On Purpose podcast in May. “I have an incredible relationship with her. I go travel as much as I can. I see her. I do spend a lot of time on FaceTime with her, but we talk about really deep things.”
Related: Hayden Panettiere Dead: What She Revealed About Her Relationship With Her 11-Year-Old Daughter Months Before Her Death
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