Whether you're catching up with a friend, grabbing dinner with another couple or trying to fill the awkward silence in a Zoom call before everyone else arrives, having a meaningful conversation can sometimes feel tricky, to say the least. Depending on how much or how little you want to share, answering questions from the person (or people) you're with can be a bit of a balancing act of being polite, forthcoming, charismatic and classy.
That's why one etiquette expert has shared a technique that "classy people" often use while chatting with another individual. This clever approach allows you to share only as much personal information as you're comfortable divulging before skillfully getting yourself "off the hook" to say more. So, whether you're introverted, simply not in a talkative mood or you're just looking forward to getting to know someone else better, this might become your signature move.
And this method doesn't give off a negative, dismissive vibe, either. Instead, it will likely leave the other person feeling seen and valued. A win-win.
Find out what she recommends doing, along with specific examples of this technique in action. Plus, two more expert-backed tips to keep in mind for an extra classy interaction. Spoiler alert: It's important to prioritize authenticity.
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When you're answering a question, etiquette expert Laura Windsorpreviously told Parade that she recommends using the “bounce back technique” by giving your response and then immediately putting the spotlight back on the other individual.
“A truly classy and charismatic person has the ability to focus the attention on other people and make them feel like they are the most important person in the room,” she explained.
This can look like asking specific follow-up questions that don't elicit only simple yes or no responses. Instead, they provide a level of thoughtfulness that can be heart-warming for the recipient and allow them to share their opinion or experience in a deeper, more meaningful way.
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"My weekend was great, thank you! What did you do for fun?""I loved that movie! What did you think of it overall?""Yes, the kids are getting so big! Are yours getting into any sports or hobbies these days?""The summer has been busy, for sure. I've seen photos of some of your recent trips—what's been the standout so far?"
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2 More 'Classy' Tips To Keep in Mind
Here are a couple of other things "classy people" tend to do while chatting with someone else.
1. Pay attention to your body language
Psychologist Dr. Gayle MacBride, Ph.D., LP, previously shared tips with Parade on how to be more charismatic, and paying attention to nonverbal cues was a big callout.
“Use your body language to tell the other person that they are the most important thing to you right now,” she explained. “Leaning your body in a little toward the other person communicates that you are fully engaged.”
2. Make sure your compliments are genuine
Sometimes, we try to fill the silence of a conversation by pointing something out like, "I love your earrings" or "Great job with your presentation." However, it's important to be aware of your own motivations for praising someone else. If you're simply trying to "win points" or get on someone's "good side" for your own gain, it would be classier to bite your tongue.
“When someone does this just before or right after asking for a favor or a need to be met, their compliments can be/feel [not genuine],” Dr. Denitrea Vaughan, PsyD, a LPC-Supervisor who specializes in coping skills, relationships and self-esteem, previously told Parade.
She added, “When compliments and affirmations are not genuine, they can come across as patronizing and reduce a person’s motivation and self-confidence."
Similarly, using the "bounce back technique" is "classy" when its done in a genuine, authentic way—not as a performative or fake approach.
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Sources:
Laura Windsor, a UK etiquette expert who received training from a former member of The Royal Household of Her Majesty the Queen, and a trusted advisor to international royal families and celebritiesDr. Gayle MacBride, Ph.D., LP, a psychologist with Veritas Psychology PartnersDr. Denitrea Vaughan, PsyD, a LPC-Supervisor who specializes in coping skills, relationships and self-esteemHence then, the article about classy people often use this technique in conversations etiquette expert explains was published today ( ) and is available on Parade ( Saudi Arabia ) The editorial team at PressBee has edited and verified it, and it may have been modified, fully republished, or quoted. You can read and follow the updates of this news or article from its original source.
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