One of the main traits of a good mom or good dad is working to keep their child well. No one is perfect at this, of course, and that’s OK. We all get sick at times and just have to do what we can. For example, you might encourage your child to wash their hands thoroughly or add a couple of extra immunity-boosting foods to their dinner plate. You probably taught them to cough or sneeze into their elbow, and you might encourage them not to touch surfaces when you two are running errands. These are all key steps that help prevent a kid from getting sick (at least not as often or as seriously).
What’s interesting, though, is that’s far from all you can do to help your child stay healthy. According to a psychologist, certain emotional traits and behaviors can help your child stay in good physical shape, too. Yep, your emotional health and your physical health—just like your mind and body—are more tightly connected than you might realize. When you’re supporting their emotional health, you’re not only supporting them with emotion management.
Ahead, that psychologist shares with Parade what it can mean if your kid hardly ever catches a cold, stomach bug or flu, five traits of parents whose kids rarely get sick and other ways you can boost their emotional and social health.
Related: ‘I’m an ER Doctor—This Common Cold Remedy Sends People to the Hospital Every Year’
As mentioned, helping your child avoid sickness is more about encouraging them to wash their hands and wipe surfaces.
“When children rarely get sick, it is often a reflection of the ‘biological safety’ created by their environment,” says Dr. Golee Abrishami, PhD, a psychologist and the Vice President of Clinical Care at Octave.
Biological safety is a mix of the tools and approaches that create safety and protect the environment’s health. That includes various facets and variables, including the three mentioned here:
Remember how the body and the mind are tightly connected? That’s shown here.
“When a child feels emotionally secure, their nervous system stays in a ‘rest and digest’ state,” Dr. Abrishami says. This is known as the parasympathetic nervous system; it helps the body relax and recover.
On the other hand, a stressful environment creates stress in the body.
“Chronic stress floods the body with cortisol, which suppresses the immune system,” she continues (cortisol is the stress hormone).
The benefit of co-regulation
When you’re able to regulate and calm your emotions, your child is better able to, as well—and that has health benefits.
“By providing a predictable and nurturing presence, you act as a biological buffer, protecting their developing immune systems from the inflammatory effects of emotional distress,” Dr. Abrishami explains. Chronic inflammation can lead to various diseases, research says, including cancer, cardiovascular disorders and autoimmune conditions.
Attachment and the nervous system
Yet another body-mind connection that deals with inflammation and immunity: “Positive parenting and secure attachment stimulate the vagus nerve, which acts as a direct line between the brain and immune system,” Dr. Abrishami says. “A healthy vagal tone helps the body regulate inflammation and recover from minor pathogens more effectively.”
You can engage your vagus nerve with a deep breathing technique, she adds, which is naturally relaxing and brings you back to the “rest and digest” state.
Related: Psychologists Say Parents Who Raise Kind Kids Share These 9 Unexpected Habits
5 Common Traits of Parents Whose Kids Rarely Get Sick, According to a Psychologist
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Besides things like cleanliness, what are some emotional traits of parents whose kids rarely fall ill? Dr. Abrishami shares five major examples below.
When a child knows what to expect from their parents, their body is less likely to get inflamed from stress. They might be able to trust that their parents won’t yell at them, for example, even when they mess up. That increases feelings of safety. On the other hand...
“Chronic hypervigilance floods the body with cortisol, which suppresses the immune response,” according to Dr. Abrishami.
2. Employs active co-regulation
As you may have witnessed, children aren’t fully able to calm themselves independently—but you can help.
“Parents who co-regulate, which means staying calm when the child is upset, help settle the child’s heart rate and breathing,” Dr. Abrishami says. “This prevents the inflammatory spikes associated with toxic stress that can wear down immune defenses over time.”
Empathic listening is crucial not only for relationships but also for overall health and well-being.
“These parents can empathize with a child’s distress without becoming overwhelmed by it themselves,” Dr. Abrishami states. “By maintaining their own regulated baseline, they prevent the ‘stress contagion’ effect, ensuring the household environment remains a place of recovery rather than a source of physiological strain.”
Related: 35 Simple, Sincere Phrases To Express Empathy, According to Therapists
4. Committed to their own healing
Parenthood isn’t only about keeping your child well, but keeping yourself well, too.
“Parents who address their own intergenerational trauma through therapy break the cycle of inherited stress,” Dr. Abrishami explains. “By resolving their own triggers, they provide a sort of biological buffer that allows their children's immune system to focus on growth rather than defense.”
Parents employing the aforementioned traits (and other positive ones) consistently and reliably also support their child’s health.
“Expectations and routines send a message to their children that they are safe,” Dr. Abrishami shares. “This sense of stability allows a child’s body to spend less time in ‘alert mode’ and more time in other natural states, which support healthy development.”
Those five traits aren’t the only ways to keep your child healthy in a physical, social and emotional sense. Dr. Abrishami shares additional recommendations.
Prioritize ‘repair’ over perfection
Relationships will have conflict. That’s not only inevitable, but good, because it provides us with the healing opportunity to repair.
“When you lose your cool, apologize and reconnect,” Dr. Abrishami encourages. “This teaches your child that relationships can be strained but still remain safe and mending, reducing the social anxiety that comes from not knowing what reaction to expect.”
Related: 9 Ways To Begin Your Emotional Regulation Journey as an Adult, According to a Licensed Therapist
We get it: Turning to your phone can be incredibly tempting. Challenge yourself not to.
“Parents who are present rather than ‘distractedly present’ (physically present but distracted on a screen) foster deeper attachment with their children,” Dr. Abrishami explains. “In our hyper-digital world, 10 to 15 minutes of undivided, child-led play where the screen is away and the child picks the activity can be a powerful way to connect and keep sickness at bay.”
Model self-regulation
As mentioned, emotion regulation is huge for helping your child avoid getting sick. Your emotional regulation is key, too, because your kids are watching and learning. For example, you might say something like, “I’m feeling a bit stressed, so I'm going to take three deep breaths before we drive.” This is a real-time tutorial in nervous system management that Dr. Abrishami recommends.
“[Kids] learn that emotions are manageable moments in time, not permanent states,” she adds.
Model sleep hygiene
Sleep hygiene, not just personal hygiene, is crucial. After all, not getting enough sleep increases inflammation in the body, which, again, can contribute to the development of disease. So, keep up with sleep hygiene tips, such as limiting screen use and engaging in a relaxing bedtime routine.
“When parents prioritize their own rest and digital boundaries, they are modeling nervous system stewardship,” Dr. Abrishami shares. “By visibly showing that you value sleep, you teach your child that rest is a non-negotiable pillar of health, not a chore to be avoided.”
As evidenced here, emotions and safety are non-negotiable pillars of health, too, reducing the likelihood of sickness. Consider keeping that in mind as you go about your day.
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Related: Psychologists Reveal: You've 'Succeeded' as a Parent if Your Adult Child Has These 11 Subtle Habits
Sources:
Dr. Golee Abrishami, PhD, is a clinical psychologist and the Vice President of Clinical Care at Octave.Inflammation: The Cause of All Diseases, CellsHence then, the article about 5 traits of parents whose kids rarely get sick psychologist shares was published today ( ) and is available on Parade ( Saudi Arabia ) The editorial team at PressBee has edited and verified it, and it may have been modified, fully republished, or quoted. You can read and follow the updates of this news or article from its original source.
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