How to Have Sex With Your Friends (and Not Fuck It Up) ...Middle East

Children of the '90s have three core fears: quicksand, getting stuffed into a locker, and having sex with a close friend. Our elders in film and TV warned of these canonically agonizing ways to die, be publicly humiliated, and worse - to ruin a friendship. And while few of us have ever had to get unstuck from a sinkhole or unfold our limbs from a cold, metal container, many have attempted friend sex, and many more have thought about trying it. In a survey of 2,000 US daters last year, dating app Flirtini found that two-thirds of women had fantasized about sleeping with a friend, and more than half had fantasized about a friend while hooking up with someone else.

But it's hard to shake the stigma that surrounds sleeping with your friends. Either it will lead to a deep, life-altering romance, or it will create an unbreachable rift in the friendship - at least that's what we've been told to believe about adding sex to a platonic dynamic (or the less savory term, friends-with-benefits). If we were to trust the media we consumed as kids, we'd think there are only two outcomes, and neither of them involve staying friends.

Sex therapist Sarah Chotkowski isn't buying it. "It's absolutely possible to stay friends with someone after you've had sex," Chotkowski tells Popsugar. "Though you have to be pretty self-aware to pull off having sex with your friends."

Experts Featured in This Article

Sarah Chotkowski, LICSW, is the founder of the Pomegranate Institute, a virtual sex therapy private practice for individuals, couples, and polycules in Massachusetts.

In queer circles, friend sex stigma still exists, but it carries a little less weight. Queer sex therapist Keanu Jackson recently affirmed his followers on TikTok that "there is nothing wrong with having sexual relationships or sexual contact with your friends." Chotkowski, who is also queer, says that sex with friends might be more common among queer folks because they're "more likely to have deep platonic intimacy with people they also find attractive."

Ultimately, attraction to a friend is very common, Chotkowski says. "Our close friendships contain care, love, and trust, often across years if not decades. These are all important precursors to great sex. Our friends celebrate us at our best and don't judge us (too much) at our worst. In many ways, it's the closest we come to unconditional love."

The following six steps to successful friend sex can apply to anyone - regardless of sexual orientation - who can "conceptualize sex as a natural extension of the care and chemistry that already exists in the relationship," as Chotkowski puts it. If that's you, having sex with a friend could absolutely be the move.

Step One: Have an Honest Conversation With Yourself

Before you do anything drastic, sit yourself down for a nice chat. Some questions Chotkowski recommends asking:

Chotkowski suggests actually writing it all down in a little pact to yourself, so there's no backtracking if the other person pitches a dynamic that isn't a good fit.

Step Two: Have an Honest Conversation With Your Friend

Time to bring in the friend. This is when you discuss everything you've been chewing on individually, to gauge if your friend shares that same attraction and desire to do something about it. If protecting your friendship is really important to you, you're going to want to have this conversation in private, while both of you are sober, Chotkowski says.

This part can be terrifying, trying to guess how your friend might respond. But remember that this person cares about you and wants the best for you. "It's actually pretty badass to put yourself out there emotionally," Chotkowski says. "There's nothing wrong or embarrassing about going after what you want, even if you don't get the outcome you expect. No one has ever died from embarrassment."

If the friend feels the same way as you, it's time to discuss shared goals, and to establish some basic ideas about what this new level of intimacy between you will contain, Chotkowski says. Some things to ask:

Step Three: Have Sex With Your Friend

This one is pretty self-explanatory.

Step Four: Consider Some Temporary Guardrails

In the time following a hookup with a friend, amp up the sensitivity. "If the goal is to transition back to friendship," Chotkowski says, "maybe you plan to do only daytime hangouts for a bit or avoid talking about who you're dating."

Step Five: Continue to Tend to the Friendship Outside of Sex

If the sex felt good and you think you want to continue exploring it while also maintaining your friendship, Chotkowski recommends prioritizing hangouts that are not focused on sex. "If going thrifting was your thing, still go do that, and don't tack sex on the end of it." Schedule separate dates that are for sex and dates that are for friendship, Chotkowski says. "It will make it easier if you decide to ever transition the relationship back to friendship without sex."

Step Six: Extras to Consider (and One Non-Negotiable)

Whenever you're expanding your sexual circle, getting regular STI tests is a non-negotiable. Another tip Chotkowski shares is to identify one person, ideally a neutral party, to confide in about the situation, so that you always have a clear-headed sounding board if things get a little sticky between you and the friend you're sleeping with.

Remember that life is long and relationships change, and if you and your friend care as much about each other as you think, you can work through more than you might realize.

"Relationships do not have to be one specific way to be meaningful. Platonic friendships can be deeply meaningful, so can romantic ones, and platonic ones that contain a little bit of spice," Chotkowski says. "Don't be so narrow in your definition of 'meaningful' or 'important' that you miss out on something wonderful."

Hence then, the article about how to have sex with your friends and not fuck it up was published today ( Wednesday 28/01/2026 - 07:34 PM ) and is available on popsugar ( Middle East ) The editorial team at PressBee has edited and verified it, and it may have been modified, fully republished, or quoted. You can read and follow the updates of this news or article from its original source.

Read More Details
Finally We wish PressBee provided you with enough information of ( How to Have Sex With Your Friends (and Not Fuck It Up) )

Also on site :

• Who Is Anthony Kazmierczak? Ilhan Omar Attack Suspect Identified
• India curbs ‘grocery under 10 minutes’. But riders must still fatally race
• Country Star Forced to Postpone Sold-Out  Minneapolis Show Due to ‘Safety’ Concerns: ‘I’m Not Here to Act Oblivious’