Drew Barrymore is looking back on her career as a child actress—and how constant commentary about her appearance affected her self esteem.
The television personality was joined by Valerie Bertinelli for an episode of The Drew Barrymore Show on Wednesday (Jan. 14) during which the pair looked back on nostalgic photos from some of their major life moments.
When Barrymore presented a photo from early on in her carer as a young actress, she reflected on how she was feeling in the moment and the criticism she was facing from everyone around her.
"This picture...It just breaks my heart. I was 10 years old and I just was told by everybody, 'You don't look how you did in E.T. You're too heavy. You're not blonde enough. You're not old enough. You're too young. You’re not tall,'" Barrymore recalled, per People.
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She added that everybody "just started getting involved in the way [she] looked" even though she was just a little girl trying to figure herself out while growing up in the public eye.
"It's like, I don’t know what I'm supposed to be for other people," Barrymore shared. "And you don't know yourself at 10. What I'm so relieved about now is that it's four decades later, I'm 50...I do know what's important now, and the look in my eyes is so clear."
She added, "It's nice to know that no matter how low it gets, or how much pressure we feel, or how unproud of ourselves, or how we are not pleasing to someone else, or we're not fitting into some mold someone created for us…that real, true happiness is just this choice we make."
Barrymore went on to acknowledge that everyone faces a "battle and a beautiful, internal war" to get to a place where they can actually say "I deserve happiness."
"That, if it takes you a long time to figure out, it’s okay. As long as we learn it at some point," Barrymore said, adding that if anyone out there feels the pressure to be a certain way, they are "not alone.'
"I have been there with you, and it is not a comfortable feeling," she said. "Somehow, some way, on the other side of that is like... kind of adulthood, and a personal freedom, and a desire to stop pleasing everybody else and start realizing what it’s gonna take for you to feel good about yourself, no matter what you look like or feel like."
You can hear more of Drew Barrymore's conversation with Valerie Bertinelli below.
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