When chronic insomniac Steph McLean read that Japanese Prime Minister Sanae Takaichi boasted about zero to three hours sleep being the “norm”, she thought it was massively irresponsible for the leader to promote such an unhealthy habit. For McLean, three hours is a “good” night, but she doesn’t see all those “extra” hours in the day as a positive, as the lack of sleep has caused issues with her health, her relationships, and is one of the reasons she’s never had children.
“My mum says I was born with Fomo (the fear of missing out). I was an awful sleeper, with even the slightest sound waking me up. She said I used to fight sleep so hard that it often brought her to tears. She couldn’t understand why I just never wanted to settle,” says McLean. Despite taking her to the GP as a child, her parents were never able to get to the bottom of her sleep issues and were told she would grow out of it. But she never did.
McLean’s sleep issues continued into high school and university, where she would sometimes go for two or three days without sleeping a wink, and found that her nights were filled with racing thoughts. “I’d lie in bed listening to the sounds of the house settling around me. My mind wouldn’t switch off. Sometimes it would be replaying awkward conversations from five years ago. Other nights it would be making endless lists of things I need to do tomorrow. Occasionally, my mind raced for no reason at all.”
When McLean would eventually drift off, it would usually be sometime after two or three in the morning. Then, without fail, her eyes open again around six. “I’ve learnt not to look at the clock anymore because watching the minutes tick by only makes me feel worse. I already know I won’t get back to sleep,” she says.
For almost everyone, three hours falls a long way short of what the body needs. Most adults are advised to get seven or more hours a night by the NHS, and a panel of sleep experts settled on a recommended range of seven to nine hours for healthy adults. The exact figure shifts a little from person to person, and with age, but three hours is nowhere near enough for most people.
Getting significantly less than optimal sleep over a prolonged period, especially for months or years, is associated with a range of physical and mental health problems. As sleep scientist Sarah Carpenter explains: “Sleep is essential for memory, learning, and emotional regulation, which is why you often feel foggy and slow, with poorer concentration, a shorter fuse and reactions that lag. Sleep deprivation is also linked to high blood pressure, stroke and a weakened immune system, so chronic sleep loss should not be ignored.”
Research suggests that poor sleep over many years may increase the risk of cognitive decline and dementia. During deep sleep, the brain clears away waste products, including proteins such as beta-amyloid, which are linked to Alzheimer’s disease. While poor sleep is considered a risk factor, it is not thought to directly cause dementia on its own.
When McLean tells people she’s awake for more than 20 hours a day, they often say, “I’d love to survive on that little sleep”, as if she’s somehow unlocked a productivity hack. “I usually smile politely, because it’s easier than explaining that I just about manage to function every day, and most days I feel like I am not living, but merely existing.”
She may suffer from a lack of sleep, but it’s certainly not for a lack of trying. “I’ve been to the GP, been prescribed anti-anxiety medication and antidepressants. But these didn’t help. I’ve followed every single sleep hack. I go to bed at a sensible time. I put my phone away. I deleted all social media accounts last year to stop doomscrolling. I’ve tried meditation, lavender sprays, magnesium supplements, breathing exercises, weighted blankets and hundreds of pounds worth of herbal teas,” says McLean. But nothing has worked.
OCD diagnosis
It wasn’t until a diagnosis at 33 that McLean started to understand a little about why she struggles so much with sleep. “I was diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) last year, by a psychiatrist who my parents paid for me to see privately because they were worried that the insomnia was going to kill me.” Suddenly, the nights of racing, intrusive thoughts started to make sense.
Carpenter says that OCD can significantly disrupt sleep, leading to various sleep-related issues such as insomnia, fragmented sleep, and poor sleep quality. “OCD and insomnia frequently co-occur. Intrusive thoughts can cause issues with sleeping, and poor sleeping can exacerbate OCD symptoms. It’s a vicious cycle.”
In one small study published in 2021, researchers measured sleep quality in people both with and without OCD. Study results showed that participants with OCD were more likely to experience poorer sleep quality and more frequent sleep disturbances than those without.
McLean is now working with a mental health specialist with an interest in OCD and sleep, and is quietly positive about the future. But that doesn’t mean that decades of poor sleep haven’t affected her life. McLean frequently suffers from coughs and colds, and feels her poor immune system is a result of her sleep issues. She is in a relationship, but she says her insomnia is one of the reasons she doesn’t want to have children. “Imagine if I passed my sleep issues onto a child and set them up for a life like mine? I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself.”
Often, people she meets have no idea that her sleep issues affect her so much. “I’m great at putting on a mask, and telling people I am OK, when I am not. I’ve become an expert in concealing my eye bags, putting on an extra perky voice and trying to pretend that I am not utterly exhausted all the time.”
McLean was made redundant from her home-based office role earlier this year, and wonders if her work performance was to blame for her job loss. “My redundancy was one of many in my company, but I wonder if my insomnia is to blame. My memory isn’t great. I lose words halfway through sentences. Sometimes I’ll read the same paragraph five times because none of it has gone in. I felt like my brain isn’t firing on all cylinders for most of the day, and my work definitely suffered.”
People assume exhaustion means you’ll eventually crash, but for McLean, that isn’t the case. “My body seems permanently stuck in overdrive. I’m utterly wiped out, yet somehow too alert to sleep. Insomnia is cruel and lonely, and I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. And I certainly wouldn’t boast about getting less than three hours of sleep a night, like it’s something to aspire to.”
As Carpenter says: “Three hours is survival mode. It’s the amount you scrape together on a bad night, not the amount you build a life around. Even people who feel like they can cope on little sleep need more than that. You can survive on a small amount of sleep for a limited amount of time but it’s not sustainable long term and could lead to serious health issues in the future.”
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