In the end it was the ultimate Taco moment – thank God.
Donald Trump’s decision to call off his apocalyptic strikes on Iran meant he once again lived up to the nickname Wall Street traders have given him: Trump Always Chickens Out.
But my goodness, didn’t we come uncomfortably close to what could have been the start of the third World War.
Trump had vowed to launch an air assault at 1am UK time on Wednesday morning that would target Iran’s power plants and bridges.
“A whole civilization will die tonight,” the President said on Monday, adding with jaw-dropping glibness: “I don’t want that to happen, but it probably will.”
The President’s U-turn came 90 minutes before the deadline that put the entire world on edge and drew worldwide criticism, with even Pope Leo calling the plans “truly unacceptable”.
The threat of a war crime – the bombing of civilian targets – had sparked the biggest pushback against Trump since 2018, when Pope Francis led the criticism of his separation of migrant families.
In his announcement of the ceasefire, Trump said that there would be a two-week pause in his threat to annihilate the entire Iranian nation.
But really he sounded like a man who desperately wanted it all to be over, saying it was an “honour” to have this long-term problem close to a resolution.
He claimed that the Iranians agreed to reopen the Strait of Hormuz, the narrow waterway which carries 20 percent of the world’s oil and has been effectively shut down since the conflict began on 28 February.
In statements from senior officials, Iran claimed that it was America that had agreed to its terms, including that it controlled the Strait of Hormuz, all sanctions would be lifted and that it could continue to enrich uranium – a non-starter for the US.
The fact that both sides were so far apart added to the sense of desperation from Trump: can you imagine the Good Friday agreement being announced only with Tony Blair and the IRA contradicting each other?
With the reality of what was agreed, if anything, unclear, it does appear that we have been brought back from the brink for now.
But this episode has done incalculable damage to America, and Trump.
It isn’t so much that Trump has turned Europe against him – the potential invasion of Greenland did a pretty good job of that – he has likely lost the support of many Iranians too.
It’s one thing to bomb the hated Iranian regime, it’s another to threaten to wipe the entire country off the face of the Earth.
Does Trump really expect Iranians to welcome him as a liberator when he’s to blame for blackouts and hospitals reduced to rubble?
And does anyone expect us to believe him next time he makes such outrageous threats?
At 79 years old and in his second term in the White House, Trump is closer than ever to bringing us the moment we all feared when he first ran for President in 2015.
As he came down a golden escalator in Trump Tower, critics wondered what would happen when you gave control of the nuclear codes to a madman whose idea of strategic thinking is to set his TiVo to record Fox News.
Now we have the answer, and it was shocking.
We are also getting a disturbing picture of how Trump was led to war thanks to reporting in The New York Times which said he is now surrounded by yes men who do not stand up to his whims.
Only Vice President JD Vance made the case as to why the conflict would be a bad idea, making an eerily accurate prediction about the closure of the Strait of Hormuz and rising petrol prices.
As The New York Times reported, US intelligence agencies mocked claims from Israel that the conflict would be quick, the Iranians would rise up against their rulers and that the Islamic theocracy would be replaced.
Trump ignored them and focused on the things that mattered to him: blowing stuff up and killing Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei.
This whole episode was so senseless you do have to wonder if Trump’s only goal is to make season two of the Trump White House more dramatic than the first.
That’s the problem when you live in a reality TV show as the President does: you have to keep upping the ante to keep people watching.
Heaven help us for what the end of season cliffhanger will be.
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