Finally, we have a winner, and it’s watch-in-real-time, unstreamed, un-binged TV. It’s a rare and beautiful thing in 2025 to sit staring at the screen, knowing millions around the country are sitting on similar edges of seats, waiting to find out which of the five remaining players will emerge triumphant of The Celebrity Traitors.
That was the warm-up for the best, biggest twist of all, when Alan Carr came through as the final, solitary traitor left standing, telling the others, almost sadly, "I am, and have always been, a Traitor." Nick collapsed, David sighed, Alan cried and the sweet Faithful pair ended up comforting him in his moment of guilty triumph. It was perfect, must-watch TV.
All that classical training and scholarship served Olusoga not – ultimately, he just didn’t have the skills, or possibly stomach, to either betray or sniff out the treachery around him, which doesn’t really reflect that badly on him, I suppose. Instead, Joe’s strength of purpose saw Cat disposed of, but that same zeal proved his undoing at the very last Round Table, as Alan used all his powers of persuasion to unsettle others’ doubts in the big man, and clear his way to victory.
The first came when the third Traitor was initially unearthed, and even his fellow conspirators laughed out loud; the second when he was finally revealed to the Faithful, a moment set to become a nation-sweeping meme. The Chatty Man’s presence as a giggling assassin in plain sight set the tone for the whole series, and Alan’s charm could explain why the faithful were jaw-droopingly inept in unearthing the Traitors in their midst, and also why they were so quick to forgive him for his treachery. There he stood — emotional, funny, no longer deadly – in a fitting end to a series that has confounded any fears a celebrity version would dilute the simple human premise — betray or be betrayed — at the heart of it. What will we all do now?
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