Your joy and energy levels often go hand in hand when it comes to friendship. Healthy friendships energize you, and you get a pep in your step when you see that friend texted you. Depleting ones may prompt you to slog over to pick up the phone, the dread building with each step."Sometimes we’re tired, so we may chalk the lack of joy up to that, which it genuinely could be, but other times that internal sense is an indication that something has changed within the relationship and that it is not as fulfilling as it once was," points out Dr. Brandy Smith, Ph.D., a licensed psychologist with Thriveworks.Related: 9 Phrases That Give Off a Bad Vibe Without You Even Realizing It, According to a Psychologist
2. You need a rehearsal before a hangout or call
Your pal reveals their engagement or that they got a puppy on social media. In the past, you'd immediately double-tap the post, comment and follow up with a gleeful phone call or text. Now? is lucky to get a thumbs-up reaction. The same goes for when big things happen to you, and you don't feel the need to tell them."If you notice life events happening, and you aren’t sharing them with this person, it is worthwhile to explore why," Dr. Smith says. "We usually reach out to share cheer when joyful things happen and solicit support during a struggle. If these life events are happening and you’re not reaching out to this friend, it could be an indication that they are not nourishing you."Related: 22 Surprising Habits That Make You 'Instantly Unlikable,' Psychologists Warn
4. Things feel lopsided
Friendships can involve a lot of fun and games. However, constant competition can become exhausting, especially because—outside of a friendly pickleball tournament—we should feel like we're on the same team as our "crew.""If you feel like there is a competition between you and your friend and sense that they are comparing your lives to try to prove their point, it is definitely unhealthy," shares Kaja Sokola, CP, LPC, a clinical psychologist and psychotherapist. Related: 8 Common 'Dark Empath' Phrases in Relationships and How To Respond, According to Therapists
6. You share less
This one is especially easy to overlook because your guilt may not be telling you what you think it does."Guilt can disguise itself as being a 'good friend,' but if you’re always feeling on edge about meeting their emotional needs, that’s not healthy reciprocity," Dr. Hafeez reveals.Related: 11 Genius Phrases To Respond to Guilt-Tripping and Why They Work, According to Psychologists
8. You're second-guessing yourself
You're sleeping like a baby, work is going swimmingly and yet? You need 10 hours of shut-eye after an hour with this person. Dr. Smith says that feeling exhausted after interacting with a friend without a physical reason is a red flag. "This can be an indication that you feel like too much is being taken from you or that you are giving too much," she says. "It can be tough to pick up on this sign when we are not being honest with ourselves about how we feel, or are not engaging in self-awareness or reflection to even notice it."
10. Your gut is screaming at you
5 Tips for Coping With Draining Friendships
People can be "friends forever." However, Sokola notes that it's crucial to remember that people aren't stagnant, and neither are relationships."Friendship goes through different phases," she says. "Sometimes, we just need a space and distance, but if the friendship is real, it will survive."
2. Reflect and decide
Do I want to have a conversation with the person to discuss potential changes we can make together?Are there things I can change within what I'm doing, saying or expecting that can help things improve?Might I want to end the relationship?
"Depending on the length of time and quality of the friendship, I recommend at least considering what you can do on your own or a conversation with the person to ensure you are not engaging in problematic avoidance coping," she says. "However, sometimes ending a friendship will be what is needed, whether it is an early step or an eventual step."Related: Self-Absorbed People Often Display These 12 Traits Without Realizing It, Psychologists Say
4. Don't overshare
They say sharing is caring. However, not oversharing with a friend who depletes you is a form of self-care."Keep your updates light and general," Dr. Hafeez recommends. "The less personal material you offer, the less you feed a dynamic where they vent and you absorb. It helps shift the tone from emotional dumping to something more manageable."
5. Empower yourself
Related: 9 Signs Someone Is a Negative Influence on You, Psychologists Warn
Sources:
Dr. Sanam Hafeez, Psy.D., an NYC-based neuropsychologist and director of Comprehend the MindDr. Brandy Smith, Ph.D., a licensed psychologist with ThriveworksKaja Sokola, CP, LPC, a clinical psychologist and psychotherapistHence then, the article about 10 subtle signs a friendship is draining you psychologists warn was published today ( ) and is available on Parade ( Saudi Arabia ) The editorial team at PressBee has edited and verified it, and it may have been modified, fully republished, or quoted. You can read and follow the updates of this news or article from its original source.
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