Bonkbuster Rivals makes Footballers’ Wives look like The Wire – if you want to see what 80s was like, watch Bullseye ...Middle East

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AS everyone has already noticed, but hardly anyone has dared to say, there is a very obvious issue with Rivals’ show-jumping anti-hero Rupert Campbell-Black, who is, allegedly “the handsomest man in England.” He’s not. Aidan Turner, who plays a psychopathic left-wing chat show host called Declan O’Hara Even Danny Dyer as Freddie can’t save this turgid  Eighties misfire Nor is he anything like it, unless England’s gene pool has shrunk to the size of Hickstead’s water jump overnight. In a very flattering light, he looks a bit like Gareth Bale.

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