Claudia Winkleman stands at the front of a small, spooky church, her eyes blacked out with too much eyeliner and an oversized white ruff taking over her neck. “A moment of silence,” she booms, “for the celebrities gathered today.” And just like that, a new series of The Celebrity Traitors is almost upon us.
The BBC has given us a sneak peek at the upcoming series, due on our screens in autumn – and it’s got me practically vibrating with excitement. Sat in front of Winkleman are some of the most recognisable faces in British entertainment – Miranda Hart, Ross Kemp, Richard E Grant, Maya Jama, Michael Sheen – each of their faces struck with bemused anxiety. Some, like The Last of Us actor Bella Ramsey, can’t hide the thrill of being on The Celebrity Traitors (ie the best programme on television) from their faces.
“Thoughts and prayers,” continues the host, before exiting and whispering directly to us: “Who doesn’t love a dramatic exit?”
If you didn’t know any better, the dramatics of this 30-second clip would have you thinking that the partaking celebrities’ lives really were in danger. That one – or two, or three! – of them would actually be murdering the others in the dead of night. And it sounds like they felt the same – Ed Havard, the BBC’s director of entertainment, has said that the “paranoia” in the upcoming celebrity series is “off the scale”.
“The thing about this season is things happen that you didn’t think could happen on The Traitors, that you have never seen before,” he said during an appearance at the Edinburgh TV Festival. “I can’t stop thinking about it … I really wanted to step in and go, ‘no one is actually being murdered’. I don’t want to give too much away, but there are tears in this series. I don’t think that I thought there would be this many surprises in this season… but there are.” It sounds like we’re in for a treat.
With each new series of The Traitors, celebrity or civilian, I grow concerned whether they’re going to be able to pull off the magic again. And each time, they have exceeded my expectations. The joy of the format is that anything – save, perhaps, an actual murder – can happen (and if Havard’s sentiments are anything to go by, this time it sounds like it does).
Better still is the fact that much of the drama is generated by the players themselves, rather than producer meddling. It’s impossible to forget the supposedly unbreakable alliance between Faithfuls Joe Marler and Nick Mohammed, which came to a dramatic end when Mohammed betrayed his partner-in-faithfulness at the final roundtable and effectively handed Traitor Alan Carr the win. It’s a turn of events that a programme maker could only dream of concocting.
Which brings me on to the line-up, which is just as brilliant as last year’s. The first celebrity series was an utter triumph – it’s no wonder that famous folks are clambering over one another for a seat at the roundtable. Joining the aforementioned household names are James Acaster, Professor Hannah Fry, Amol Rajan, Joe Lycett, Romesh Ranganathan, and Jerry Hall, to name but a few. With their conflicting personalities, knowledge of what makes good television, and very healthy egos, it’s no wonder that paranoia plagues The Celebrity Traitors castle.
There’s no confirmed start date for the upcoming series yet, but if it follows the same release schedule as last year, we should expect the incumbent Faithfuls and Traitors to take over our TVs in early October. For now, all that’s left to do is wait and start developing our theories. My money’s on Richard E Grant as the most devious Traitor we’ve seen yet…
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