Confident people typically do certain things in conversations—and some might surprise you—such as asking open-ended questions, smiling, shortening their sentences and speaking authentically. Creating habits like those is a helpful start on your journey. It can also make you more likeable and help you have more faith in yourself.
Related: 12 Phrases That Make You Instantly More Assertive—Without Sounding Rude, Psychologists Say
What’s the Difference Between Confidence and Arrogance?
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“Confidence is a solid sense of self that does not boast about self to try and make others look ‘less than,’” says Dr. Brandy Smith, PhD, a licensed psychologist with Thriveworks in Birmingham, AL. “Arrogance carries a sense of ‘better than’ with it and often has a slimy feel connected to it.”
“Someone who is confident is secure within [themselves] and does not feel inclined to need to talk often about ‘how great’ they are, whereas someone who is arrogant is actually insecure while making comments in an attempt to ‘show’ others ‘how great’ they are,” she explains.
Certain phrases (that you’ve probably heard before) come across as arrogant, even when they're meant as confident. Dr. Smith shares and explains nine examples.
“I am not saying to never use this phrase, but be mindful of when you use it and how it can come across,” she continues. “A better alternative would be, ‘I have a good idea for us to try.’” Feel the difference?
2. “If they had just asked me/come to me, they wouldn’t have had any problems”
“This implies that you are the one who needs to be involved for things to run smoothly,” Dr. Smith says. “It has a ‘know-it-all’ feel that is problematic.”
“Someone who cannot see or acknowledge to self or others that they sometimes make mistakes is lying to self and/or others,” Dr. Smith says.
4. “I always know what to do”
Again, this phrase uses “always,” presents the speaker as perfect and shows them “not acknowledging their humanness,” according to Dr. Smith.
Rather than persuasive, this comes across as braggy.
6. “Everybody wants me”
Dr. Smith clarifies that saying this with a certain tone can pass as playful, but you’re still walking a thin line.
Related: 11 Subtle Signs of Narcissism That Are Easy to Miss, According to Psychologists
“A person may genuinely be surprised that someone does not know something, but anyone would be hard-pressed to say this phrase in a way that does not come across as problematic,” Dr. Smith says.
8. “I get what I want”
“In this phrase, it more directly taps into the perceived power the person wants to be viewed as having to make things happen the way they want,” Dr. Smith explains.
Related: Psychologists Say These 9 Habits Make You Seem Insecure Without Realizing It
4 Ways to Still Be Confident but Not Rude
“For some people, acknowledging any strength or accomplishment can come across as arrogant or rude because they are not used to what acknowledging one’s strengths are can look like in a healthy way,” Dr. Smith notes.
“Acknowledging a strength, positive or accomplishment, is not problematic,” she continues. “It is more about how it is done and for what purpose.”
1. “I have what I think is a helpful idea. Is this the time to share it?”
A phrase like this acknowledges your expertise humbly. It also provides others a space to say if that’s not what they need right now. You know, those moments when you want solidarity rather than advice.
Speaking of solidarity versus advice, this phrase offers both. Use it instead of “I always know what to do” or something similar.
3. “I have not encountered that problem before, but I hear what you’re saying, so let’s look at it together”
Teamwork makes the dream work, right? This phrase also acknowledges that no one is perfect or has the answer to every situation, especially right away.
4. Generally, not going “on and on” about the accomplishment
Sharing, say, an award or promotion you received, but not talking about it endlessly or omitting a simple “thank you,” is another safe bet.
Up Next:
Related: These 7 ‘Bad’ Habits Actually Signal High Emotional Intelligence, Psychologist Says
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Dr. Brandy Smith, PhD, is a licensed psychologist with Thriveworks in Birmingham, AL.Hence then, the article about 9 common phrases people think sound confident but actually sound arrogant psychologist reveals was published today ( ) and is available on Parade ( Saudi Arabia ) The editorial team at PressBee has edited and verified it, and it may have been modified, fully republished, or quoted. You can read and follow the updates of this news or article from its original source.
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