Speaking on her podcast Dumb Blonde, the 44-year-old revealed she took a Retatrutide(Retä), a newer, even more potent drug in the same class of tirzepatides like Mounjaro and Zepbound — and experienced severe mental health side effects that left her struggling with suicidal thoughts.
The podcaster, whose legal name is Alyssa DeFord, described symptoms that went far beyond typical sadness. She felt completely emotionally numb, unable to experience any pleasure or connection to things that normally brought her happiness.
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"I had no emotion. You could see. Like, my eyes were black," she explained. "I couldn't even listen to music, music that brings me joy. I just drove in silence because I just couldn't handle anything."
"I'm 20 days out now from taking it, and I finally am getting my joy back," she shared. "But that was a battle."
Why Did Bunnie XO Share Her Story?
"My story is not what's gonna happen to you," she stressed. "There's so many people who are taking Reta and love it."
Her comment section proved this point, with reactions ranging from "It works wonders for me" to "I got this on Zepbound!!!!" and "Triz caused this for me it was hell."
Bunnie's willingness to share her difficult experience demonstrates the transparency she's built with her audience since launching "Dumb Blonde" in 2019. The podcast regularly tackles mental health, personal struggles and real-life challenges, making it a trusted space for honest conversations.
Bunnie XO's Life Beyond This Experience
Photo by Penske Media on Getty Images
Jelly Roll, whose real name is Jason DeFord, has consistently credited his wife as his biggest supporter and the person who inspired him to change his life. The two married in 2016 and renewed their vows in 2023.
Bunnie's story serves as an important reminder that weight loss medications, while helpful for many, require careful monitoring — especially regarding mental health changes.
If you or someone you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts, please contact the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988.
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