His gums can light up a room.
“You know how you give a 12-year-old money and they start buying stuff?” Avalanche goaltender Scott Wedgewood told me Saturday when I asked him to explain veteran defenseman Brent Burns.
“But then he’s got really interesting stuff, too. He’s got the ranch. He’s got a number of different animals. It’s obviously cool. He’s earned it.
“It’s just like a funny kid that’s just running around your locker room. But he’s older than everybody.”
The funny kid turns 41 in March. As he reflected on a two-goal afternoon against Columbus to a circle of reporters, a Funko Pop! dinosaur stared back at us from Burns’ locker stall.
“Two lucky ones,” the Avs defenseman said after Colorado’s 4-0 win over the Blue Jackets. “They come from guys being in good spots in front of the net, obviously.
“Lucky bounces. We’ll take ’em though.”
You know what’s not luck? The fact that Burns is on a pace for 43 points this season. That the big lug with no front teeth on Saturday became just the fourth D-man in league history to produce a multigoal game after the age of 40. The others? Nicklas Lindstrom, Zdeno Chara and Tim Horton.
“I mean, we’ve loved it (here),” Burns, who’s on a 1-year deal with Colorado, said of Avs Life. “We’ve loved everything about it. On and off the ice, family and everything, it’s been great.”
Meanwhile, he’s been everything they’ve asked. And more. Yes, the Avs are demolishing teams because they’ve got the best player in the world (Nathan MacKinnon), the best defenseman on the planet (Cale Makar) and a coach (Jared Bednar) so level that you could set a shelf with him.
But it takes a village to get to 33-4-7.
It takes depth. It scorers who can take the edge off the stars. It takes grinders who embrace their roles. It also takes jokers who can keep a locker room from ever getting too tight.
It takes Burns scoring twice. It takes a debut NHL goal from blue-liner Ilya Solovyov. It takes a first career shutout from Trent Miner.
“It’s how you win,” Bednar reflected later. “If you want to win a lot, you’re going to win in different ways, and different guys (have) got to be chipping in. That’s what our team’s been doing a lot this year.”
The Avs won by four goals without a point from MacKinnon, Makar or Martin Necas. No Gabe Landeskog. No Devon Toews. No problemo.
Can we ask the CPU to just sim the rest of the season through to late March?
The Avs had a 12-point lead on Dallas as of early Satutrday evening in the Central division standings. The only things standing the way of the burgundy and blue right now are the Olympic break and general boredom.
Enter Burnsy.
“We’ve gone to his house (when) he had a party, and he’s just got like random samurai swords,” Wedgewood continued. “He’s got night-vision goggles.
“I joked with him about the Randy Jackson quote from (the movie) ‘Stepbrothers,’ like, ‘Why do you have an autograph on that stuff?'” And that legendary rucksack Burns carries around?
“He told me one time he had a 5-pound weight in his backpack, and he didn’t realize it for two months,” the Avs goalie laughed.
“So that’s kind of funny, that he couldn’t figure out that there (was) five extra pounds in there. It tells you how much (expletive) is in there.”
You need those dudes. Someone who can lighten the mood when the waters kept choppy. Who can act as a natural counter to MacKinnon’s drive and relentless perfectionism. And if they can chip in 12 to 15 goals from the blue line, too, that’s a bonus.
“I don’t think either shot would go in (when it left my stick),” Burns said. “You know, (Josh Manson) even talked about today, (how) this game has a funny way of humbling you back-to-back. So we just talked about having a good game … Like I said, there’s lucky bounces, but it’s a (reward) from being in good spots.”
Still, ain’t it funny how elite teams keep making their own luck? Burns got the hosts on the board with a wrister from the slot late in the first period. Solovyov put the game away in the third stanza with a nifty laser from the left faceoff circle that made it 3-0.
“I was really excited for Solo. I jumped in the pile and he almost buried me,” Burns recalled. “It was probably the hardest hit I took all night.
“Yeah, I think it’s exciting for them. I love them. (It) always takes you back, you remember those things and it’s special to get to share that with anybody else. And (to) see the work (Miner) he puts in and have him have a special night like that, it’s always great.”
So was he, now that you mention it.
“Why Denver?” I wondered.
“Lots of reasons,” Burns replied.
“How much fun was today?” I asked the defenseman he turned the corner and headed out of the locker room.
Up went the dimples. Out came the gums. Clear as a full moon.
“I’m always having fun,” Burns countered.
The smile said it all. Who needs teeth when the rest of the NHL is eating your dust?
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