Happy New Year, folks. May you and your loved ones have a safe and happy and prosperous year, and may the Chicago Cubs start the year out by landing Tatsuya Imai. Aren’t you happy the posting period expires tomorrow so you can stop listening to me obsess about it? No? GOOD. BECAUSE I AM GOING TO OBSESS EVEN HARDER.
The legend of wetbutt23 and KatiePerrysBootyhole is well established at this point, with the pseudonymous duo having broken the Jose Quintana/Dylan Cease/Eloy Jimenez trade on Reddit long before any traditional sources. It’s a funny, true story, and it has endured for years as a source of joy (even as the trade, itself, definitely did NOT endure as a source of joy). If only for that reason, even as I do not want the Cardinals to be able to move Nolan Arenado at all, I very much want this to be true:Alright folks, this popped up on Reddit. Supposedly some guy overheard a conversation while sitting on the toilet, and according to him, Soler and Moore are gone in a deal for Arenado. ?I actually laughed out loud reading it, but if this somehow turned out to be true… how… pic.twitter.com/3wgQza9RM3
— ⚾️?Joseph?? (@loveofsports24) January 1, 2026 “Remember that time a guy got diarrhea and overheard the details of the Nolan Arenado trade from the crapper?” “What a sh–y trade!” “The Cardinals finally dumped Arenado, eh?” “Cardinals really made a splash with this one.” That could be our future, folks. I think it’s going to happen. I’ve mentioned before that it seems like the Cubs really need to add a high-quality veteran on a minor league deal to be depth in the outfield at Triple-A Iowa. Yes, the group in Chicago is well-covered, and you also have Owen Caissie and Kevin Alcantara on the 40-man, but as things stand right now, at least one of those two is going to be in the big leagues as a fourth outfielder. And the Iowa outfield right now consists of Parker Chavers and … uh … Brett Batemen maybe? Eventually there might be more upward movement in the system, but it’s a pretty wide open area for some added depth. Anyway, that got me thinking that the Cubs need to sign Austin Slater to a minor league deal. He was a great fourth outfielder a few years back for the Giants, but then fell way off with some terrible results the last couple years. So why would you even want the 33-year-old on a minor league deal? Well, for one thing he can play all over and mashes lefties, which the Cubs might very well need. But more specifically in his case, I’m intrigued because last year, there were some massive changes to his swing, and his contact quality was actually outstanding (14.3% barrel, .334 xwOBA). Slater’s results appear to have been sunk primarily by the elevated strikeout rate (which, yes, is an issue if the only way he can make the better contact is by whiffing too much) and a whole mess of bad luck. That’s exactly the kind of veteran who can bounce right back, and whom I’d love to see the guys get on a minor league deal, because why not? (I wouldn’t say no to old friend Mike Tauchman either, though (1) I’m not sure he won’t get a big league deal, and (2) his left bat is a slightly less great fit compared to Slater’s righty bat, when considering all the possible uses.) Speaking of outfielders on minor league deals, the White Sox got one of their own:The White Sox have signed Jarred Kelenic to a Minor League deal with non-roster invite to camp, per source. Kelenic, 26, was @MLBPipeline’s No. 4 overall prospect in 2021 but hasn’t broken out in five seasons with Seattle and Atlanta. @JesseRogersESPN was on it.
— Mark Feinsand (@Feinsand) December 31, 2025 Jarred Kelenic has just not been able to make it work in the big leagues, and maybe he never will, but that is probably his best landing spot on a minor league deal. Lotta opportunity there, which is also why I won’t be bothered that the Cubs didn’t get him. For them, it’d be pure depth, and you kinda prefer a veteran over a risky-upside type. Then again, he did do this that one time at Wrigley Field: MORE CUBS FROM BLEACHER NATION: Go Ad Free | Subscribe to the BN NewsletterOn the final day of the calendar year, let's look back at the trades made by #Blackhawks GM Kyle Davidson and hand out some grades. How many of his trades were wins? And how many were ultimately related to each other? t.co/A1wCSrK77y
— Bleacher Nation Blackhawks (@BN_Blackhawks) December 31, 2025From False Starts to Foundations: Why the 2025 Bears Feel Different t.co/zOyW1gMdoG
— Bleacher Nation Bears (@BN_Bears) December 31, 2025No Coby, No Giddey, No Problem! Bulls Blitz Pelicans at Home, 134-118 — December 31, 2025 t.co/hYnqDhFI26
— Bleacher Nation Bulls (@BN_Bulls) January 1, 2026Hence then, the article about ring in the new year quite the cardinals rumor outfield depth desired and other cubs bullets was published today ( ) and is available on Bleacher Nation ( Middle East ) The editorial team at PressBee has edited and verified it, and it may have been modified, fully republished, or quoted. You can read and follow the updates of this news or article from its original source.
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