Ever since I started writing about white-knuckling the hormonal rollercoaster that is perimenopause, the online advertising algorithm has homed in on me and my fluctuating oestrogen with the precision of a drone. If there is a product out there currently being marketed to middle-aged women struggling with hot flushes, itchy tits, and mood swings that make serial killers look rational, believe me, I have seen it. I might have even bought it, and let me tell you, there is some absolute garbage out there.
You can buy pyjamas for the menopause, scented oils for the menopause, and body sprays for the menopause. I’ve even seen magnets being advertised for the menopause which will set you back £44. If you’re wondering what makes these products suitable for someone going through the onslaught of physical and mental symptoms that can accompany shifting hormone levels, it’s that they have “menopause” written on them. If you needed another steer, look out for purple packaging. Whenever advertisers want to appear sympathetic to menopausal women, they do it with purple. “Peri purple” I call it, and once you see it, you cannot unsee it.
You can buy purple crystals, shampoos, moisturisers, socks, cookery books, teas, protein bars, chocolate, and pillowcases, that are all proudly claiming to help those poor women left flailing in the wake of the end-of-level-boss that is the menopause. The details of quite how these products alleviate symptoms are seriously lacking, but who needs that information anyway? It says MENOPAUSE, doesn’t it? Isn’t that enough? We made the label purple, for God’s sake! Pull your menopausal socks up and stop asking questions.
square KATE LISTER The menopause revolution is at a dangerous tipping point
Read More
The phenomenon of flogging purple snake oil to hormonal women has been called menowashing, and it is everywhere. I am thrilled with the increased awareness around perimenopause and menopause, and it’s a very good thing that more help and support is now on offer, but there is no doubting that the menopause has also become a great way to cash in on women who are struggling, and a lot of what is on offer seems to be just junk.
I truly thought I’d seen it all, but then it happened. A product so ludicrous and laughably audacious in its effort to jump on the menopause bandwagon that I needed a sit down to fully process what I was looking at.
A menopause vibrator. Yes, you did read that correctly: a vibrating dildo specifically for menopausal women. Surely, we have now reached the zenith of menowashing? The plusOne Menopause Massager, to give it its full name, is currently available online for a steal at £34.99. I can only assume it is completely unusable for anyone other than a woman dealing with perimenopause/menopause.
And what does this incredible (purple) product do to “alleviate symptoms associated with perimenopause and menopause”? It heats up. Because that’s what any woman dealing with hot flushes that could be measured on the Scoville scale needs, right? A hot vibrator up her chuff? Genius.
I think what offends me most about this product is just how blatant it is in slapping the word “menopause” on a box and sending it off on its merry way, as if that is all that is needed to sell to “women of a certain age”. As if we are that gullible. We all know that companies are now cashing in on the raised awareness around menopause to flog us what appears to be rubbish under the guise of “healthcare”, but surely this one has got to take the menopausal biscuit (which actually exists, by the way.)
Now, if I had been on the marketing team for the plusOne Menopause Massager, I might have suggested they sell this product as an aid to those dealing with vaginal atrophy, which can be caused by low oestrogen. I don’t actually think a warm vibrator is going to do anything to help with thinning vaginal tissue and painful intercourse, but that would have provided some kind of medical sounding bollocks to put on the packaging. All the other bullshit peddlers have made the effort!
At least with menopausal socks and pyjamas, the hook is that they are made from breathable fabrics. Teas for menopausal women claim they are made from “cooling” herbs, and the body sprays often lean into aromatherapy claims about calming scents, but, in my opinion, the marketing for this vibrator is just lazy. They have made next to no effort to talk the customary pseudoscientific bilge about the menopause to us.
The only information offered is that “this massager helps relax muscles and increase blood flow”. If there was any doubt as to the intended purpose of this item, it offers “gentle menopause support with a slim and curved form to easily insert and provide comfort”. And that’s it. That is how it “offers perimenopause and menopause symptom relief”. It’s curved and it heats up. A towel rail does that but will do very little to help deal with acne or insomnia.
What makes this particularly irritating is that there is a very important conversation to be had around sex, pleasure, and the menopausal vaginas, but none of that gets so much as a look in.
This kind of crap makes me so angry because while there is a plethora of dubious products available to “help” women dealing with hormonal changes, what we actually need is sorely lacking. What women really need is more funding into research, accessible, affordable HRT, and greater awareness around what happens to the body when the ovaries decide to pack up. We don’t need a sodding warm vibrator.
It’s not that I begrudge anyone taking a crumb of comfort where they can get it. If cotton pants and bubble baths helps, you crack on. If you feel comforted by a purple magnet, I support you all the way. It’s the companies that are making bank by convincing women the road to hormonal salvation is paved with herbal teas and slightly warm sex toys that utterly enrage me.
There are many lotions and potions out there that can offer some relief, but they don’t require purple packaging and an increased price tag to do so. Breathable knickers are a mercy for everyone but slapping the word menopause on them does not transform them into a specialist product. It’s the same with shampoos, vitamins, moisturisers, and vaginal lubricants. A moisturiser with “menopause” written on it will be exactly the same thing as one without it.
And as for the plusOne Menopause Massager, I absolutely despair. Until it comes with HRT included, I feel quite comfortable saying this product will probably do very little for those struggling with hormonal changes that a regular vibrator can’t do. If you need it warming up, try holding it during a hot flush and see if that helps.
Hence then, the article about with the menopause dildo we ve officially reached peak menopause bollocks was published today ( ) and is available on inews ( Middle East ) The editorial team at PressBee has edited and verified it, and it may have been modified, fully republished, or quoted. You can read and follow the updates of this news or article from its original source.
Read More Details
Finally We wish PressBee provided you with enough information of ( With the menopause dildo, we’ve officially reached peak menopause bollocks )
Also on site :
- Trump Wants To”Unleash Hell” In 2026; POTUS Tries To Go Full Maximus With A Misguided ‘Gladiator’ Flex
- GCE Global Solutions Corp. Announces Strategic Acquisition of GCE Payroll Advisers Inc. to Strengthen Global EOR and Payroll Platform
- Parents of Campbell Hall student killed in the school’s parking lot file wrongful death suit