Piers Morgan, whom I have known personally for more than two decades, is not a man inhibited by self-doubt. Even in times of crisis, of which there have been a few – the insider trading scandal when he was editor of the Mirror, the publication of fake pictures from the Iraq War, his retreat from prime-time American TV and, latterly, the public spat with Harry and Meghan that resulted in him leaving ITV – he has managed to maintain a confident, spritely and nerveless mien that I have long envied.
It is a talent, for sure, and, combined with Morgan’s ability to think on his feet, assert his opinions and understand intuitively what stirs the public forum, it has made him rich, notorious and as big a celebrity as those whose company he keeps. He may not be everyone’s cup of Earl Grey, but he bestrides the world of contemporary media like a colossus, with his own YouTube channel, almost nine million followers on X, omnipresence on mainstream TV and a regular diet of books.
Even though he edited a traditionally left-wing newspaper for nine years, he has also created a position for himself as the Hammer of the Liberal Left, an unrelenting opponent of all things woke. And his latest book, Woke is Dead is a self-fulfilling treatise on the idea, bluntly put, that the ascent of Donald Trump has torched what Morgan calls a “woke-ravaged” landscape.
Oh, and in case you didn’t know, Morgan and Trump are on first-name terms, exchanging texts on all manner of topics, from global diplomacy to golf. It must be fun to be Morgan, no? A hotline to the White House, friend to billionaires and big shots, a glamorous wife, one of the wealthiest, most famous journalists on the planet. Who wouldn’t like all that?
Well, if you do actually want to be like Morgan, help is at hand. The final chapter of his new book is entitled “The 13 Life Lessons for Making Your Own Luck”, and, over 48 pages, our hero lets us into the secrets of his success, or rather, how you can make fortune work in your favour. It’s an unashamed hat-tip to Jordan Peterson’s own self-help tract, 12 Rules for Life, but, as far as I can see, Morgan’s counsel is more pertinent.
Whereas Peterson includes such fairly purposeless advice as “Stand up straight with your shoulders back” and “Do not bother children when they are skateboarding”, Morgan takes a more practical, case-driven approach. “Keep Pounding” (Lesson three), “Be Grateful not Hateful” (Lesson nine) and “Back Yourself” (Lesson 10), are all lessons drawn from Morgan’s professional experience, and are valuable watch-phrases for anyone who, like him, wants to survive the vicissitudes of daily life.
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Channeling Rocky Balboa, Morgan says that “dominance is impossible without perseverance” and, quoting such diverse sources as DH Lawrence, Cristiano Ronaldo and Joanna Lumley, he says that “working in journalism for my entire adult life has left me with a very thick skin for dealing with the simple fact that truly horrible things happen every single day”.
Some might dismiss Morgan’s list as a roll call of truisms, but I cannot fault much of his philosophy, and I wholeheartedly agree with his instruction to “Embrace FOMO” (“Apply a common-sense filter [to Instagram]. Remember that if they were having that much of a good time, they wouldn’t be on their phones telling you about it”), “Put the Phone Down” (self-explanatory) and “Tell Us What You Really Think” (an exhortation to “be polite and respectful but severely allergic to bullsh**. Follow your gut instinct instead of the herd and never be afraid to say what you mean”).
I have my own life rules that are more esoteric and somewhat less profound (“Always go to bed when someone starts singing ‘American Pie’,” “Don’t make a big decision in the hours of darkness”, that sort of thing), but I wouldn’t be presumptuous enough to think that other people would be interested in my words of wisdom.
If only I’d had Morgan to guide me through life and make me believe that my opinions, like his, really are important.
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